Part 2 of “The Romantic Story of How I Met My Husband”.
(Click here to read Part 1)
Here’s what happened after I left Brazil.
[Above photo: our last night in Brazil, spontaneously performing together at a restaurant]
I was feeling heartbroken and uncertain as my team and I left Brazil. Would I ever see Nuni again? I felt such a strong connection to him that it was painful being apart. We stayed in touch through phone and email for a while, and our feelings kept getting stronger.
I was still working as a missionary and had a deep relationship with God. I felt conflicted about my feelings for Nuni. They were so strong, but why? And how? We'd only known each other for 2 weeks! We hadn't kissed, we hadn't even held hands! How could I be so in love with him?
I knew one thing for sure. I didn't want to be in a long distance relationship. I'd been there, done that, and didn't want one again! I'd been in a few relationships and at the age of 23 was ready to find THE ONE. I prayed to God about my feelings. I asked God to take the feelings away if they were not meant to be.
I felt a very clear answer from God, which was: "How can I take away your feelings if you're talking to him all the time?" I felt that God was challenging me to stop all communication with Nuni. That was DEFINITELY not what I wanted, but I felt it was the right thing to do.
I told Nuni the news and although he was sad, he was very respectful and agreed to stop communication.
Fast forward 5 months. I was back in Canada. There wasn't a day that went by that I didn't think of Nuni. It was so hard not talking to him. I even tried to go back to Brazil to surprise him, but my visa was denied. They had found out I did missionary work the last time I was there, and apparently you needed a special visa for that. So they denied my request to enter Brazil again. I even lost $800 on a ticket.
On June 15th (my birthday), exactly 5 months to the day we stopped talking, I went for a walk. I prayed to God, "When is it going to be okay for us to speak again? These feelings aren't going away!" I heard a voice in my head saying, "If Nuni writes to you today, it's okay."
"Hmph", I thought. "I haven't heard from him in 5 months, I doubt I'll hear from him today." Did he even know that it was my birthday?
I kid you not, when I got home from that walk, I checked my email, and there was a message from Nuni. The first communication from him in 5 months.
It said:
"Happy birthday…" with a link to a YouTube video. The video was of him, playing and singing a song he'd written for me. The song title was "Pray For You". The lyrics go like this:
"So far, my heart goes
Trying to find the nearness of you
I'm not supposed to look for you,
But I can't control my dreams
When I sleep, I dream of you
Then I wake up, thinking it was real
I'm afraid I'll never see you again
So I pray for you"
It was such a beautiful song. I cried and cried and cried. I felt that was my sign that it was soon time to begin communication again. It didn't matter if we didn't talk - those feelings wouldn't fade!
I didn't consider myself a songwriter back then. But when you're inspired by love, you can do almost anything! I wrote him a song back called "Soon":
"Soon, soon, my heart is saying soon
How long will it be until chega de saudade? (the end of missing you)
Soon"
A few weeks later Nuni and I reunited over the phone, and it was glorious. We dated online for about 5 months, and he made plans to visit me in Canada. At this point I was living in the Yukon, basically the coldest place in the world. But he didn't care! He sold some of his musical equipment, bought a ticket, and arrived in December 2009. It was -33 degrees Celsius when he arrived. He'd never even seen snow before! When he saw snow, he picked it up with his bare hands before a horrified look came onto his face as he shook it off!
[Above photo: Nuni arrives in Canada after 13 months of being apart]
Nuni came to Canada prepared. He had an engagement ring ready, and on New Year's Eve 2009, he proposed. We got married in April 2010, 4 months later.
And that was the beginning of our beautiful life together!
Now I want to be real with you - our marriage is a normal marriage. We have ups and downs and disagreements. We do things that annoy each other. We've been through many hard moments and phases.
I don't want to make it seem like we have a perfect marriage and life, because that doesn't exist.
But it is a strong, healthy relationship that I'm so grateful for. And I have a theory why that is.
Our strong romantic connection helps, for sure. But there's something even more powerful that's gotten us through the tough times.
Do you know what that is?
It's SELF LOVE. I wrote more about it in this blog post, which you can check out by clicking here: https://lindsaymuller.com/blog/blog/5595829/the-unexpected-key-to-a-happy-relationship